one or the other...

"And when they had come to the place called Calvary, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on the right hand and the other on the left." 


Three men at Calvary. Two were criminals. They were answering for wrongdoings. But the third one? Not Him. He was no criminal. The highest authorities had found no fault in Him. 


"Then Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do..."


And His reaction to being killed, in such a shameful, painful way? Concern. Thoughts of the people around Him, who I imagine to be, unfortunately, a lot like me, and every generation after. He knew. This verse alone shows perpetual mercy, a selfless willingness, an unimaginable love. He knew, yet He asked for our pardon. Never can anyone argue that they've done "too much" for God's forgiveness, for His acceptance. We've been pardoned, in words and in action. 


"Then one of the criminals who were hanged blasphemed Him, saying "If You are the Christ, save Yourself and us."


This dude blasphemed Him. Mocked Him. Spit on Him. Treated Him as though He was of no importance. 


"But the other, answering, rebuked him, saying, "Do you not ever fear God, seeing you are under the same condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we receive the due reward of our deeds, but this Man has done nothing wrong." 


He recognized. His eyes were open. He understood the seriousness of what he was witnessing, the gravity of this death. He chose faith and belief. While everyone around him was rebuking this Man who was hung under a sign reading "King of the Jews", this criminal focused on the one thing of upmost importance.

"Then, he said to Jesus, "Lord, remember me when You come into Your kingdom." And Jesus said to him, "assuredly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in Paradise.""

Tonight, as my sweet fiance was reading to me from Luke, chapter 23, a mountain of emotions welled up inside of my finite little brain. Whyyyy? What was wrong with those people yelling "crucify Him!"? Why wouldn't Pilate OR Herod go against the crowd and refuse to kill an innocent man? Wasn't He so angry about being condemned for absolutely nothing? 


My heart breaks. Because He was killed? Not really. It had to happen. That was God's ultimate display of mercy. I get that. It breaks because I read that, and I see my face in that crowd, demanding His death and watching as He hangs. 


And the criminals... two completely opposite reactions to this Man between them. Is it just me, or do they sound way too familiar? 


How often do we, do I, offend Him? How often do I look at Him and simply choose a different direction? How often do I see His sacrifice, yet respond with only apathy? I mock Him; I rebuke Him. Those people did that day, and we've done it everyday thereafter. 


On the other hand, sometimes, I get it. Occasionally, I look around me at this world's false promises and genuinely want nothing to do with it... every once in a while, I will look to Christ and my eyes will stay fixed there, seeing the big picture, His ultimate promise. 


So, which criminal am I? Has to be one or the other. Man, I pray I resemble the second one, being counted as blameless by the God I serve. But, if I don't? If I fall into the snares all around me and get a bit too involved... He STILL died for my shortfalls, asked forgiveness for my actions. 


Because, ultimately, "...the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all." 


In that, truly I find comfort, humility, acceptance, grace. 


Good Friday happened so that a perfect God could have relationships with imperfect humans. But it doesn't stop there... oh, no, no, no. See ya Sunday!


*Sidenote: lots of these thoughts were spoken from Gavin as we talked about all of this... he read this post and said "So, um, did you write this or did I?"-- smart aleck :)

what if...

Every single day, I am thankful.

I was raised in a Christian home by amazing, supportive parents and a tight-knit extended family. 

Papaw's 91st birthday party (claimed he was taking back over the farm :)

Throughout my life, I have been given phenomenal friends, walking before me and alongside me (so blown away by this. all. the. time.)

celebrating with my favorite CN girls!! 

The most incredible man I've ever known asked me to marry him and experience life and ministry with him every day for the rest of our lives. 

practicing for our big day at someone else's :)

My soon-to-be in-laws are unbelievable and treat me just like one of the fam.

nothing like tree pickin' when you have a whole farm to choose from

what girl wouldn't want three sisters?!

I have gotten to travel to exotic (albeit some not so exotic) places, experience once-in-a-lifetime things, and meet the greatest people.

volcano hiking in Costa Rica

Republica Dominicana

Lighthouse Beach in the Bahamas

I have never known hunger or thirst.  I have clothes (too many!), a car, a house (and apartment), and a fridge full of food. I'm four months away from graduating college, five months away from becoming Gavin's wife, and (hopefully!) seven months away from starting med school. 

So, what if thankfulness was so authentic it was expressed in all I do?
 "...giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." 

Ephesians 5:20

what if it flowed so deeply I didn't even notice the day-to-day nuisances?
 "Take heart; I have overcome the world."
John 16:33
what if even on my worst day, I still lifted my hands in praise and gratitude?  
"Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you and you shall glorify Me."
Psalm 50:15

What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday? 


Every single day, I am thankful. But am I that thankful?

Here's to spending all day, every day... thankful.

all because of a video...

it's my last week of classes for the semester. tomorrow, I have three papers due and one final to take. So, why in the world am I blogging when the practical, good student thing to do (and we all know i'm a GREAT student... or procrastination's best friend. whichever, i guess.) would be read, write, pull out my hair, drink some hot chocolate, and then repeat that process? 


Because of a video.

There I was, 100% committed to finishin' my 10-pager (maybe not quite 100%), when my dear, sweet, not-good-at-helping-me-focus roommate told me to check it out. reluctantly gladly opening myself to another distraction, I did just that...

And I was inspired. 

Not in the life-altering, I-want-to-go-knock-on-every-neighbor's-door kind of way... but in a soft, gentle way that happens when I am undeniably touched by Truth.

And I am, for the hundredth time today, so, so very thankful. for my God. for our purity. and for my devilishly handsome, leader of a fiance.

have I mentioned how blessed I am?!

This guy is gifted, to say the least... and I would feel totally confident setting him up with any of my not-yet-swept-away friends (unsure why I'm on a let's-hyphenate-everything-kick, but it's working for me). it's called "sexual healing", and he's addressing our society's problem of sex as recreation. watch it, soak it in. this is truth, by gosh.  

 

Like I said, gifted, right? 

Leaving you with a quote from Elisabeth Elliot...

"There is dullness, monotony, sheer boredom in all of life when purity is no longer protected and prized. By trying to grab fulfillment everywhere, we find it nowhere."

with love and gratefulness, 

Kara soon-to-be Lankford

(that sounds sooo good...)

this should be fun...

Let's be honest, there is no good time to start a blog. 

It's always a bit inconvenient too involved awkward.

I tried once... when I spent six weeks doing missions in the Bahamas (yes, it's still considered mission work even if it's in a tropical paradise :). I wanted to remember the stories, the culture, and most of all, the people (and I didn't want to repeat hundreds of stories to so many different people). 

So, what happened? After two entries (full of hilarious Bahamian phrases and a few incredible pictures), a message pops up where my blog should've been. It said something along the lines of "we're sorry. your blog has encountered an error, blah, blah, blah... it no longer exists". Well, okay, then. Point taken. No blog for me. 

This is officially effort #2. Here's to hoping it lasts longer than two entries!

On to the point: I'm gettin' hitched in 208 days. To this guy: 

Blessed or what?

That means 208 days left:

• To be a Woolsey. Weird thought? I think so. I will have spent 22 years being Kara Woolsey, and after a few words and the signing of a certificate, that will change forever. But, if I had to pick another name, I would undoubtedly choose Lankford. I am a big fan of him, his family, and an added bonus: my kids won't be doomed to the back of every classroom like I was (thank you, alphabetic order).
• To sleep in a bed by myself. Not only is this the typical transition of woman alone to woman+man, but he is 6'5. six foot five inches takes up a LOT of space, but that is an adjustment that i am absolutely thrilled to make.
• To live off PB&J and chicken noodle soup. For some reason, when you're a wife, that seems to be less acceptable than when you're just a college student.
• UNTIL MY WEDDING DAY! That once-in-a-lifetime, whatever-the-heck-you-want, you'll-plan-for-months-and-the-day-will-fly-by day. The one day in our entire lives when everyone we love will be together, praising God and celebrating our love. Sounds pretty fabulous to me, even apart from all the pretty dresses, delicious food, and brilliant dancing :)
• Until I get to live with my very best friend, confidant, encourager, admirer, and challenger. and to fall even MORE in love with him (possible? they tell me so.)
• Until we get to become one, in the blessed institution created by the God who brought us to this point, redeemed and in freedom. This=the most exciting part. We will get to:

1. Know each other in completely new ways (maybe that's where the tiny bit of terrified comes in :). In living together and in our hearts and souls being joined. In triumphs and in trials. In love and in pain. Game on. 
2. See completely different sides and depths of the God we have served and will always serve so spiritedly. Marriage is such an incredible picture of Christ and His Bride, the only picture that even can touch on that, and His love, grace, forgiveness, tenderness, and devotion will become so much clearer when we experience that firsthand. How freakin' exciting.
3. Show this picture of Christ and the Church to the whole world. Marriage is such a simple and straightforward tool to show His love to everyone we encounter, through our actions, the way we interact with each other, as well as the way God will remain the absolute center of our lives (even when I have such a good-lookin' guy next to me). We will be given the opportunity to show to the world what His deep, crazy intimate love and boundless grace looks like. 

So, all this to say... I want to keep a journal (of sorts) of this precious time in our lives, so that I will refuse to let each moment absolutely rush by. But even more, I want to share this journey with you, the people who have been so precious to us, in hopes that the Lord will receive the glory that He alone deserves. Past the wedding day, into our marriage. The excitement, the mishaps, and best of all, the growth. This should be fun!